Tag Archives: bipolar

Sea Walls

“We all build internal sea walls to keep at bay the sadnesses (sic) of life and the often overwhelming forces within our minds. We build these wall stone by stone over a lifetime. One of the most difficult problems is to construct these barriers of such a height and strength that one has a true […]

Why I Write About Manic Depression

Last October I wrote for the first time about having bipolar 2 brain disease, otherwise known as manic depression. Writing about this has become more and more important to me. Why? For three reasons: The older I get the more changes I see in the symptoms and cycles of the illness and how it affects […]

Forgiving My Father

My father had bipolar disease. How do I know? I know because I have bipolar. My father was never diagnosed with manic depression; he was born in 1911 and died in 1982 and at his death had been disabled for about four years from several previous heart attacks and strokes and adult onset diabetes. Growing […]

The Social Cycles of Bipolar and Faith

I wrote this as a Guest Post on Tony Robert’s blog, Delight in Disorder: Divine delight in a disordered world. As I look back on the cycles of bipolar that have tried to steal my life away from me, I am acutely aware of both overt and covert cycles associated with this illness. The overt […]

A Fearless Moral Inventory, Part 2

My moral indiscretions are countless. Before I was diagnosed with bipolar 2, during the hypomania cycles the decisions I made were reckless. I stumbled often; my choices were folly at best, dangerous at worst. I used drugs, promiscuously engaged in unprotected sex, stole clothing from boutique apparel stores, and for over a year dated a […]

Living in Threes

“No amount of love can cure madness or unblacken one’s dark moods.  Love can help, it can make the pain more bearable, but always one is beholden to medication that may or may not always work and may or may not be bearable.  Madness, on the other hand, most certainly can, and often does kill […]

Freedom in Letting Go

“Always measure your life solely by the standards of Jesus. Submit yourself to His yoke, and His alone; and always be careful never to place a yoke on others that is not of Jesus. It takes God a long times to get us to stop thinking that unless everyone sees things exactly as we do, […]

Thorns

I am a woman who reached out to touch the robe of Jesus, but in the surge of the crowd, was swept back, and my fingertips fell short. (Luke 8:44-48) Perhaps that’s why I so easily recognize shame, am so sensitive to grace, am so willing to offer compassion. Because I am left with a […]

A Few Good Friends

I am lucky to find myself late in life with a few good friends with whom I can be completely transparent, completely myself. I am accepted by them not in spite of my weakness, but loved because the weakness is part of my whole; it makes me who I am, and I am seen by […]

Ten Year Anniversary

This month marks ten years since I chose to follow Christ. Ten years since I walked into the embrace of my Father’s arms. Ten years since I have learned to listen to the Spirit abiding inside me. And almost 15 years since I was diagnosed with bipolar II (2). Faith is my invisible source of […]